10 Hilarious Things To Say To Your Best Friend

Hilarius Things To Say To Your Best Friend

Humor is the universal language that brings people together, and there’s no better person to share a laugh with than your best friend. Whether you’re reminiscing about old times or simply navigating the ups and downs of life, a well-timed quip can lighten the mood and make any situation a little more bearable. Ready to add some laughter to your friendship? Here are some hilarious things you can say to your best friend to bring a smile to their face.

If your best friend is feeling down, a little humor can go a long way in cheering them up. Remind them that life is too short to take things too seriously with a funny observation like, “I’ve been trying to be more positive, but it’s hard when the world is such a dumpster fire.” Or, if they’re feeling overwhelmed, offer a lighthearted perspective with a quip like, “Remember, the only thing you can control is your breathing… and your shoes.” Sometimes, simply acknowledging the absurdity of life can be enough to make us laugh and feel a little better about things.

Of course, no two friendships are alike, so what one person finds hilarious, another might find mildly amusing. The key is to know your best friend’s sense of humor and tailor your jokes accordingly. If they’re a fan of puns, for example, you might try something like, “What do you call a boomerang that doesn’t come back? A stick.” Or, if they’re more into sarcasm, you might say something like, “I’m so good at multitasking that I can procrastinate two things at once.” The important thing is to have fun with it and make each other laugh.

Sarcastic Sage

1. When your best friend is complaining about something trivial, channel your inner sage and offer a sarcastic pearl of wisdom. For example:

Your friend:	You:
“I can’t believe I lost my keys again.”	“Oh, the tragedy. Shall we lower the flags to half-mast?”
“I’m so tired of being broke.”	“Well, perhaps you should try printing your own money. I hear it’s quite popular among central banks these days.”
“I’m having a really bad day.”	“Oh, well, let me break out the tiny violins. Prepare yourself for a symphony of sadness.”

2. When your best friend is being a bit too serious, try to lighten the mood with a sarcastic jab or two. For example:

Your friend:	You:
“I’m really worried about my future.”	“Don’t worry, I’m sure you’ll find a nice bridge to live under.”
“I’m so stressed out about this job interview.”	“Don’t fret, they’ll probably just ask you to fetch coffee and make copies.”
“I’m having a quarter-life crisis.”	“Oh, boo-hoo. Welcome to the club. We have t-shirts and self-help books.”

Witty Wordsmith

When it comes to your best friend, you want to say things that will make them laugh. But sometimes, coming up with funny things to say can be hard. That’s where we come in. We’ve compiled a list of hilarious things to say to your best friend that will have them rolling on the floor laughing.

Here are a few examples of witty one-liners that you can use to make your best friend laugh:

"I’m so glad I have you as a best friend. You’re the only one who can make me laugh when I’m about to cry."
"I’m not sure why I’m friends with you. You’re weird, you’re annoying, and you’re always getting me into trouble. But I guess I love you anyway."
"I’m so glad I found you. You’re the only one who understands my weird sense of humor."
"I’m not sure what I would do without you. You’re my best friend, my confidante, and my partner in crime."
"I’m so lucky to have you in my life. You’re the best friend anyone could ask for."

Phrase	Meaning
“You’re like a unicorn: rare, magical, and hard to find.”	This compares your friend to a mythical creature, which is both flattering and funny.
“I’m so glad I don’t have to share you with anyone else. You’re all mine.”	This is a possessive but playful way to show your affection for your friend.
“I’m not sure what I did to deserve you as a friend, but I’m so glad I did.”	This expresses gratitude for your friend’s friendship in a humorous way.

Humorous Hyperbole

Hyperbole, the art of exaggeration, can add a touch of whimsy and humor to your conversations with your best friend. Here are a few examples:

“I’m so hungry, I could eat a horse!”

“I’m so bored, I’ve counted every grain of sand on the beach.”

“I’m so tired, I could sleep for a year.”

Extreme Comparisons

Take comparisons to the extreme to evoke laughter:

“You’re more clumsy than a newborn giraffe on ice skates.”

“Your singing is like a cat in a blender.”

“Your breath is so bad, it could clear a room faster than a tornado.”

Object	Hyperbolic Comparison
Your intelligence	“You’re as smart as a bag of rocks.”
Your fashion sense	“You dress like a clown on acid.”
Your hair	“Your hair is so greasy, it could fry an egg.”

Outrageous Outbursts

When you’re with your best friend, there’s no such thing as being too outrageous. Here are a few things you can say to get them howling with laughter:

“I’m so glad we’re friends. You’re the only person I can talk to about my secret addiction to glitter.”

“I just saw a squirrel wearing a tiny top hat. I think it was trying to impress me.”

“My cat is smarter than the average politician. At least he knows how to use a litter box.”

“I’m not sure why I’m still single. I’m basically the perfect combination of good looks, intelligence, and a complete inability to cook.”

“I’m so bored I’m starting to consider talking to my plants. I think they’re starting to talk back.”

“I’m not a morning person. I’m more of a ‘let me sleep until I’m absolutely sure I’m going to be late for work’ person.”

“I’m so lazy I’m practically horizontal. I’m like a human couch potato, only with less personality.”

“I’m not anti-social. I’m just selectively social. I only like people who make me laugh, bring me food, or give me money.”

“I’m so indecisive I can’t even choose what to order for lunch. I’m going to have to flip a coin between pizza and tacos.”

“I’m not a procrastinator. I’m just a firm believer in the ‘why do today what you can put off until tomorrow’ philosophy.”

Ironic Interjections

When your best friend does something completely unexpected, an ironic interjection can be the perfect way to express your surprise or amusement. Here are a few examples:

Phrase	Meaning
Well, I never!	Expresses surprise or disbelief
Fancy that!	Indicates that something is unexpected or surprising
Bless your heart!	Often used sarcastically to express disapproval or annoyance
You don’t say!	Indicates surprise or interest
Oh, really?	Expresses skepticism or disbelief

Laughing Lyricist

Unlock your inner wordsmith and shower your bestie with laughter:

Rhyme and Reason
“If your jokes were money, you’d be a millionaire. Except, people might actually want your money.”

Puns Galore
“What do you call a joke that makes you laugh so hard you cry? A tear-jerker!”

Lyrical Genius
“I asked Siri to sing a happy song. She replied, ‘Sorry, I can’t find any songs in your library with the words ‘ding-dong-ditch.'”

Sarcasm Express
“Your fashion sense is so unique, it’s like a unicorn rode a rainbow and puked on you.”

Exaggeration Extravaganza
“My love for you is like the Grand Canyon – so deep and vast, I could get lost in it and never be found.”

Tongue-in-Cheek Table

Joke
Why did the scarecrow win an award?
Because he was outstanding in his field!

Ridiculous Ramblings

Indulge in a series of absurd and nonsensical utterances that will leave your best friend in stitches.

I just realized that my pet goldfish is an accomplished mime.
I’m convinced that my refrigerator has a secret crush on me.
If trees could talk, they’d probably use a lot of puns.
My socks have a secret superpower: they can teleport to the bottom of my laundry basket.
I’m considering starting a support group for people who accidentally eat their toothpaste.
My hairbrush has developed an attitude. It’s always brushing itself and refusing to brush my hair.
I have a theory that my cat is secretly plotting to take over the world, one tuna treat at a time.
I once tried to open a jar of pickles with my toothbrush. Needless to say, it didn’t end well.
My coffee maker seems to be having a existential crisis. It keeps asking me, “What is the meaning of brew?”
I’m afraid my pillow is judging me. It just doesn’t look very supportive.

Chuckle-Inducing Chants

Here are some chants that are sure to get a chuckle out of your best friend:

“I’m not a morning person, but I can make an exception for you.”

This is a great way to let your friend know that you’re happy to see them, even if you’re not a morning person.

“I’m not sure what’s going on, but I’m here for it.”

This is a great way to show your friend that you’re always up for a good time, no matter what it is.

“I’m not perfect, but I’m always right.”

This is a funny way to let your friend know that you’re not always right, but you’re always confident in your opinions.

“I’m not a doctor, but I play one on TV.”

This is a funny way to let your friend know that you’re not a doctor, but you’re still qualified to give medical advice.

“I’m not a rocket scientist, but I can still get you to the moon.”

This is a funny way to let your friend know that you’re not a rocket scientist, but you’re still smart enough to help them achieve their goals.

“I’m not a mind reader, but I can still tell what you’re thinking.”

This is a funny way to let your friend know that you’re not a mind reader, but you can still guess what they’re thinking.

“I’m not a magician, but I can still make your problems disappear.”

This is a funny way to let your friend know that you’re not a magician, but you can still help them solve their problems.

Customizable Funnies

You can also make up your own funny chants. Just be sure to keep them short and sweet, and make sure they’re something that your friend will find funny.

Here are some ideas for customizable funnies:

Phrase	Customization
“I’m not a [insert profession], but I can still [insert skill].”	Replace [insert profession] with a profession that your friend is not, and replace [insert skill] with a skill that your friend has.
“I’m not a [insert animal], but I can still [insert animal behavior].”	Replace [insert animal] with an animal that your friend is not, and replace [insert animal behavior] with a behavior that your friend exhibits.
“I’m not a [insert object], but I can still [insert object function].”	Replace [insert object] with an object that your friend is not, and replace [insert object function] with a function that your friend can perform.

Giggle-Generating Gibberish

Prepare to unleash a whirlwind of laughter with these utterly absurd and side-splitting gibberish phrases that are guaranteed to make your best friend double over with giggles.

Table of Gibberish Delights:

Gibberish	Translation
Flibbertigibbet	A flighty, talkative person
Humbuggery	Nonsense or deception
Flimflam	A trick or swindle

Bonus Gibberish Bonanza:

Dilly-dally: To waste time
Hodgepodge: A mixture of things
Wampum: Shells used as currency by Native Americans
Shenanigans: Mischievous or silly behavior
Kerfuffle: A commotion or disturbance
Snicklefritz: An eccentric or crazy person
Whippersnapper: A young and impudent person
Doodlebug: An insect that makes doodle-like patterns in the ground
Hullabaloo: A noisy commotion
Zippity-do-dah: A carefree or silly attitude

Side-Splitting Sayings

Hold onto your sides for these gut-busting utterances that are guaranteed to make your best friend buckle with laughter:

You’re so full of yourself, you’re practically a hot air balloon.
I’d offer you a hug, but I don’t want to break your ribs from laughing so hard.
You’re like a unicorn, but instead of a horn, you have a sixth toe.
I’m so proud of you for being the only person who can make me laugh while I’m choking on a banana.
You’re the human equivalent of a rubber chicken. You’re both squeaky and hilarious.
I’m not sure if you’re a natural comedian or if you just have a permanent case of the giggles.
You’re so funny, I could watch you all day… if I could stop laughing long enough to see.
I swear, you’re the only person who can make me laugh until I pee my pants.
You’re the reason why laughter is the best medicine. I’m pretty sure I’ve been cured of all my illnesses by now.
You’re so good at making me laugh that I’m starting to worry that I’ll never be able to take anything seriously again.

Number	Saying
1	You know you’re getting old when your doctor tells you that you have “sit-down-itis.”
2	I’m not a hoarder, I’m just a minimalist with a lot of stuff.
3	What do you call a boomerang that doesn’t come back? A stick.

Hilarious Things To Say To Your Best Friend

There’s no one you can be more yourself around than your best friend. So why not let loose and say something hilarious? Here are a few ideas to get you started:

“I’m not sure if you’re a good influence or a bad influence, but I’m pretty sure I’m going to jail either way.”
“I’m so glad I have you in my life. You’re the only one who can make me laugh so hard I pee my pants.”
“I’m not saying you’re fat, but when you sit down, you create a gravitational pull that sucks everything around you into your orbit.”
“I’m so proud of you for being able to keep a secret. I mean, I’ve told you some pretty embarrassing things over the years.”
“I’m not sure what I would do without you. You’re my partner in crime, my confidante, and my personal jester.”